30 Best Coffee Quotes to Make You Laugh—and Reach for Another Cup
"I like coffee because it gives me the illusion that I might be awake."
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Those who know Ree Drummond personally wouldn't dare get in the way of her morning coffee routine—at least not if they know what's good for them. "Good or bad, right or wrong, I wouldn’t want to live in a world without coffee," Ree says. "I start each morning with iced coffee, and it’s the best way to start the day." (These days, The Pioneer Woman even has her very own line of flavored coffee pods at Walmart. Talk about commitment.)
She's not alone, of course: Most people have such a deep, passionate, and undying love for coffee, they'd be hard-pressed to find the words to describe it.
Enter this list of the very best coffee quotes out there. These poetic musings, cute movie quotes, and funny book excerpts pay homage to the magical elixir we all know and love—and they work really well as Instagram captions. In fact, just reading through them will get you in the mood for another cup (or two, or seven). Truthfully, as Jackie Chan said, "Coffee is a language in itself"—but that doesn't mean it's impossible to express how much it means to you.
Lorelai Gilmore, 'Gilmore Girls'
"I can’t stop drinking the coffee. I stop drinking the coffee, I stop doing the standing, and the walking, and the words-putting-into-sentences doing."
Megan Mullally
"I’ll quit coffee. It won’t be easy drinking my Baileys straight, but I’ll get used to it. It’ll still be the best part of waking up."
Sir James Mackintosh
"The powers of a man’s mind are directly proportioned to the quantity of coffee he drinks."
Henry Rollins
"What goes best with a cup of coffee? Another cup."
Laurell K. Hamilton
"I’d never met coffee that wasn’t wonderful. It was just a matter of how wonderful it was."
Jackie Chan
"Coffee is a language in itself."
Turkish Proverb
"Coffee should be black as hell, strong as death and sweet as love."
Leanna Renee Hieber
"Coffee first. Schemes later."
Flash Rosenberg
"I believe humans get a lot done, not because we’re smart, but because we have thumbs so we can make coffee."
Ronald Reagan
"I never drink coffee at lunch. I find it keeps me awake for the afternoon."
Louisa May Alcott, 'Little Women'
"I’d rather take coffee than compliments just now."
Jerry Seinfeld
"We want to do a lot of stuff. We’re not in great shape. We didn’t get a good night’s sleep. We’re a little depressed. Coffee solves all these problems in one delightful little cup."
Cherise Sinclair, 'Master of the Mountain'
"No matter what historians claimed, BC really stood for ‘Before Coffee.'"
J.S. Bach
"Without my morning coffee, I’m just like a dried-up piece of goat."
Hugh Jackman
"To me, the smell of fresh-made coffee is one of the greatest inventions."
David Lynch
"Even bad coffee is better than no coffee at all."
Nanea Hoffman
"Why, yes, I could start my day without coffee. But I like being able to remember things like how to say words and put on pants."
Holly Black, 'Ironside'
"Ah coffee. The sweet balm by which we shall accomplish today’s tasks."
Clark Gable
"I never laugh until I’ve had my coffee."
David Letterman
"If it wasn’t for coffee, I’d have no discernible personality at all."
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