I’d been dating my handsome now-husband for awhile when he invited me to come work cattle on the ranch he shares with his brother. Having grown up on a golf course, I had no notion of what "working cattle" entailed. But heck, I was game. If my man was involved, I was game for anything.
"Working cattle" is the term used to describe the process of pushing cattle, one by one, through a working chute, during which time they are branded, de-horned, ear tagged, and "doctored" (temperature taken, injections given). The idea is to get all the trauma and mess over with in one fell swoop so the animals can spend the rest of their days grazing peacefully in the pasture.
I took my sister along just for fun. My honey’s brother, Tim, greeted us at the chute and assigned us our duties. He handed my sister a "hot shot", which is used to zap the animal’s behind to get it to move through the chute. It’s considered the easy job. "You’ll be pushin’ ’em through," he told her.
Tim then handed me an eight-inch long, thick-gauge needle with some kind of electronic device attached. "You’ll be taking their temperature," Tim informed me. Easy enough, I thought. But how does this needle fit into its ear? Or does it slide under its arm somehow? Perhaps I insert it under the tongue?
Tim showed me to my location—at the hind end of the chute. "You just wait ’til the steer gets locked in the chute," Tim said. "Then you stick the needle all the way in and wait ’til I tell you to take it out." Oh, crap. Rectally? My sister shot me a worried look and I wished I’d eaten something before we came. I felt weak. I didn’t dare question the brother of the man who made my heart go pitter pat, but…seriously?
Before I knew it, the first animal had entered the chute. Various cowboys were at different positions around the animal and began carrying out their respective duties. Tim looked at me and yelled, "Stick it in!" So with utter trepidation, I slid the long needle deep into the steer’s rectum. Ugh. This wasn’t natural, at least not for me. This was against God’s plan. This wasn’t right.
I was supposed to check the monitor and announce if the temperature was above 99 degrees. This one was fine. But before I had a chance to remove the needle, Tim set the hot branding iron against the steer’s left hip. The animal let out a gutteral "Mooooooooooooo!", and as he did, the contents of his large intestine emptied all over my hand and forearm.
Tim said, "Okay, Ree, you can take it out now." I did. I didn’t know what to do. My arm was covered in runny, stinky cow crap. Was this normal? Should I say anything? My sister looked horrified.
The second animal entered the chute. The routine began again. I stuck it in. Tim branded. The steer yelled. The poop came out. I was amazed at how consistent and predictable the whole nasty process was, and how nonchalant everyone—excluding my sister—was acting. Then I noticed something.
On about the twentieth animal, I began inserting the thermometer. Tim removed his branding iron from the fire and brought it toward the steer’s hip. At the last second, however, I fumbled with my device and had to stop for a moment. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed that when I paused, Tim did, too. It appeared he was actually waiting until I had the thermometer fully inserted before he branded the animal, ensuring that I’d be right in the line of fire when everything came pouring out. He had planned this all along.
78 steers later, we were finished. I was a sight. Layer upon layer of manure covered my arm. I’m sure I was pale. The cowboys grinned politely. Tim directed me to an outdoor faucet where I could clean my arm. My boyfriend chuckled. As my sister and I pulled away in the car later that day, she could only say, "Oh. My. God."
A few weeks later, my man proposed. Looking back, I’m aware of just how much I was being tested that day at the cattle chute. Since he was my husband’s only sibling, Tim had to approve of me. This was merely Tim’s sick, twisted way of measuring my worth.
Ree Drummond is the founder of The Pioneer Woman and a lover of butter, basset hounds and life on the ranch! Ree started her blog in 2006, and now millions visit ThePioneerWoman.com every month for her trusted recipes and fun family stories. Here’s what she has been up to since it all began:
New York Times Bestselling Author
Ree has written two memoirs (Black Heels to Tractor Wheels, and Frontier Follies) plus nine bestselling cookbooks:
The Pioneer Woman Cooks: Recipes from an Accidental Country Girl (2009)
The Pioneer Woman Cooks: Food from My Frontier (2012)
The Pioneer Woman Cooks: A Year of Holidays (2013)
The Pioneer Woman Cooks: Dinnertime (2015)
The Pioneer Woman Cooks: Come and Get It! (2017)
The Pioneer Woman Cooks: The New Frontier (2019)
The Pioneer Woman Cooks: Super Easy (2021)
The Pioneer Woman Cooks: Dinner’s Ready! (2023)
The Pioneer Woman Cooks: The Essential Recipes (2025)
Food Network Host
Since 2011, Ree has been sharing simple, family-friendly recipes—and the occasional kitchen prank!—on her award-winning show The Pioneer Woman, filmed right on Drummond Ranch. Ree is also a regular judge on Food Network competitions, including Christmas Cookie Challenge.
Founder, The Pioneer Woman Collection
Ree has been creating and selling kitchen and home products at Walmart since 2015 and she’s involved in designing every piece and pattern. The line now includes best-selling appliances (you have to see the floral blender!), plus hundreds of pieces of cookware, tableware, and more. Ree doesn’t like to play favorites but the Agatha print has a special place in her heart.
Restaurant and Hotel Owner
Together with her husband Ladd, Ree has opened several bustling businesses in Pawhuska, Oklahoma, including The Pioneer Woman Mercantile—a bakery, restaurant, and general store that draws visitors from across the country (many come for the biscuits alone!), P-Town Pizza, Charlie’s Ice Cream Shop, and The Boarding House, a charming hotel with eight different rooms decorated by Ree and Ladd.
Media Personality
Ree appears regularly on national TV shows like Today, Good Morning America and more—all while managing to keep flour off her shirt.
Wife, Mom and…Grandma!
Ree’s kids (daughters Alex and Paige and sons Bryce and Todd) are all grown up, and as of December 2024, Ree is the proud grandma of the cutest baby ever, Sofia Scott, born to Alex and her husband Mauricio. Ree still cooks for Ladd (and the kids when they’re home), and she also looks after a few mischievous ranch dogs.
